Ahh, today. Today…the day where I literally have no voice. Today…the day where I probably did more work than all of the days. It is THE day. The day I stopped chasing and started living. Sure, I can’t really go out and “live” tonight, because I’m in recovery mode, but I did so on Monday, and yesterday, and plan to tomorrow and Friday and/or Saturday, and I think I should take a day off this weekend and do very little. Just for me. I deserve that. I’m a great person, and I’m smart and fun and enjoyable to be around, and I have a lot to be proud of, and I’m sick to death of trying to find more meaning in the evaluations of the few people whose opinion I value for what are clearly the wrong reasons.
I almost stopped going to DG on Mondays, but I changed my mind…because the few things I wish to avoid about that place, are nothing compared to the many things that make it fantastic. Maybe FBW is a more appropriate environment for me; I should look into that. So, anyway, I’ll play nice, I’ll minimize the bitterness, and I’ll go there for the reasons that I enjoy going there…when I feel like it.
Tuesday trivia may become my new favorite, or if/when I get my own trivia night, then that might be my new favorite day. Truly, yoga day is my favorite day but I’ve been having trouble scheduling that into my workweek. Not sure why I’m even bothering to rank order them. I guess I put of lot of stock into DG Mondays, and the idea that I would speak/sing. I was actually more interested in doing that before, and less interested at present. Honeymoon phase, maybe. Who knows. Who cares.
I’m openly admitting that my feelings were hurt and thus my pride and also acknowledging that I am stronger and bigger than that. So here’s my e-battle cry (because I legitimately have no physical voice): I AM WOMAN! HEAR ME ROAR…A GIANT FUCK YOU! 😛