It’s too dark to take out my notebook, so I shall try to find my solace here. It’s not the same, but at this rate of texting speed, it’s close enough. I’m sitting atop Wachusett Mountain (summit: 2006 ft.) with a host of other astrological enthusiasts. Some have telescopes, some cameras, some dogs, some kids, but all share one thing: the desire to be right here, right now. It’s likely that we are all vastly different, with our own lives and our own tastes, and yet we are here, to share in this one thing, likely for different reasons. I wonder what my own is and I can’t answer it in words. I can only look up at the bright light shining above me and feel it’s power. Something spiritual without religion, something strong and yet so weak. I’m reminded that this is also a metaphor for myself. I am spiritual but not religious, strong and yet so weak. I had every intention of coming here to be sad, to try to find some meaning in those questions I’m reminded today that continue to dominate many of my thought processes. What I found instead was peace. A calmness and reassuring sense that “no doubt, the universe is unfolding as it should.” And I will do the only thing that I can and trust that feeling, trust the pull of something bigger than myself, something to trust and believe in, whether its existence is real or not. Welcome to the next hour of my life. I have found some people to chat with and I have a decent amount of scotch in the flask to help quell the chill up here. It’s a bit of a way back, but it’s all downhill from here. And I wonder in a very fleeting moment if that…is also a metaphor.