Bad timing.

So far this entire “break” is nothing but unfortunate events and bad timing. Now its 3 a.m. and I’m in one of those weird flee as fast as you can moods. I sort of want to be wrapped in jeans and a sweatshirt, sitting on a beach somewhere pondering the meaning of life. I mean, I’m metacognizant enough to know why (see: post about finding my new feel-good movie), but I’m not yet good enough to turn it around myself. I truly dislike this state that I slip into. I’m stubborn and I’m defiant and I don’t want for anything, except the above mentioned scene complete with a pack of smokes and a bottle of…anything. No,  nothing’s wrong. Or maybe everything’s wrong. So what do I do now? Acknowledge it, “own” it, and wait for it to go away. I wish ‘hate it’ was in that list, ’cause I think I’ve got that part down to a science. Here’s to containing myself to the point where I don’t have a girly emotional meltdown. Good night.


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