I’m pretty sure I was met with resistance for the first time since I’ve moved here today.  I also realize I sometimes come across as though I am selfish and always need my way.  This is not true.  I often try to find the simplest or most efficient way to do things, but I’m never adamant about having them done how I’ve suggested.  If I say it would be easier to eat first and shower second, it probably will, but that doesn’t mean you have to eat or shower at all (I hope you would eventually though, ’cause then we can’t hang out, you disgusting pig).

I realize this might be a problem for persons that are non-confrontational or maybe have histories of being told what to do instead of given choices.  I suppose it could be a potential problem for just about anyone, right?  That’s definitely something I will make an effort to be cognizant of in the future; however, I default to efficient, time-saving methods for everything, and I’m not sure that I mind.  So I’m either going to have to keep my mouth shut half the time and go with the flow, or I’m going to have to go out on my own…

…but I guess the latter’s more likely, considering I’m beginning to feel farther away from just about everyone.  I thought it might be different here, being in a group of rather like-minded individuals.  But I can’t make anyone like me, and I wouldn’t want anyone to like me for anything other than who I am.  I understand I don’t exactly open up to people, but that’s something that comes with a long history of trust for me.  Too many people I’ve trusted have walked out on me, and I’m talking friendships and relationships alike. Admittedly, some have been my fault, but not recently.

We’re all really friendly to one another, and a lot of us have stuff in common.  Me? I can’t find much, other than a Type A personality, clinic duty and four classes.  Perhaps I just need to be patient.  Perhaps I will never feel differently.  I should probably be prepared for either. I’m never alone; I’m alone all the time.

I’m losing friends from home because I hate Gchat, too.  Hell, I guess I’m losing friends here for the same reason.


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