Take 2

Well, then. After rashly deleting my initial blog I have decided I’d rather continue with the picture-a-day…until, of course, I skip too many days for me to feel like I’ve been able to maintain my new attempt at blogging. I’ll decide what to do with everything I’d created if and when that time comes to pass.

Today was not as bad an emotional day. I got a little glum over the Results paper I have to write for my Research & Writing class, but I stayed tough. I did a lot of work tonight on it, but have little to show save for a shaky table, but progress is progress nonetheless.

Mike told me I overreacted over something earlier, and he was right, but I angrily chose to disengage myself from the conversation instead of dealing with it. I imagine I should apologize. Perhaps I will do that following this post.

I took two pictures today, of two of the biggest things in my life (during the week anyway, as Chris battles with school for the top slot): school and work. Rather than choose between the two, I thought I would just post both.

This is the Javits Lecture Center at school. It’s an awkwardly designed building, diamond in shape with confusing corridors leading to all 10 or so classrooms it contains. The array of flora is new to the recently renovated building and it has certainly come a long way since my first days at SBU. My only gripe with it is the heightened level of air conditioning blasting throughout unnecessarily. Bring a sweatshirt or suffer the consequences!

Secondly, this is Taylor. She is the daughter of the owner of the practice I work for. She’s a sweetheart, but a spoiled one (what only child isn’t?). She’s just another north shore east coast Long Island girl in the making though — her manicure/pedicure was the news of the day, in not her favorite color, purple, but pink-to match her outfit. Still, the girl is adorable:

I wrote a letter for work today that was “perfect” on the first draft. I think it was the first time ever something I had produced was not requested to be modified. I thank the law firm for that. As well as my NYT crossword subscription. I keep meaning to tell Barbara I still use it. I will try to do so this weekend when I drop by to give her some things.

In other news, I’m happy for Jo, who got herself a new job today, even if it is in the Bronx. So long as she’s happier there, I’ve no beef with who her employer is.

I truly wish I didn’t generalize my own actions as part of a greater picture all the time. There’s something to be said for progress with oneself, but I have a difficult time determining when it’s okay to “screw up.” Obviously, no one is perfect, and things can’t always run smoothly. But how often is too often? How much is too much? How long is too long? I imagine I will have a difficult time sleeping this evening. I am not a fan of doing things in complicated ways, but it appears without utmost constraint, sometimes it is impossible for me not to. I fear the consequences of my own actions, and although I will try to keep myself calm in their respect, there will likely always be a part of me that “worries.” I will summon my positive thinking and try to hold it near. I feel like I may have gone from uber-negative to uber-positive and have now landed somewhere in the middle. I’d like to find out how to get back to uber-positive, because everything went quite well and I felt the happiest when it was the reining mindset. It must be possible if I was there once. Right?

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